An Apple From the Teacher: Maslow's Hierarchy for Parents

An Apple From the Teacher: Maslow's Hierarchy for Parents — Lynn C Peterson, MEd

Years ago I learned about something called Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (view here), named for its developer, psychologist Abraham Maslow. It is particularly good for us as parents since it gives a very clear explanation of what each of us need to grow and thrive, to be comfortable with ourselves and with others. While this is true for us, it is equally true for children.

Basically it's merely a pyramid which begins at the bottom, with physical requirements -- requirements which allow the child to be comfortable, without being sleepy, hungry, thirsty, or even too hot or too cold. As these needs are met the pyramid progresses to feeling safe -- emotionally and especially physically.

The middle of the pyramid considers emotional fulfillment for children. To thrive children need to feel loved. They need to feel that they belong to a social group -- such as their family in young children and social groups as they get older. They need a sense of recognition, achievement and success.

If all of these needs are met children can apply themselves to the process of learning and developing understanding free from worry about their more basic needs.

The tip of the pyramid is labeled as "the need for self-actualization." Simply put, children have the freedom to spend time discovering who they really are.

What does this mean for you and me? If we want our children to learn and grow then it is important for us to provide a strong foundation so that the levels can build upon one another. Maslow felt that if one level is weak the needs above that level are difficult to develop.

It sounds pretty basic, but astoundingly there are children who actually develop a rare condition called psychogenic dwarfism when their emotional or physical needs went unmet. Amazing, huh! So the message to us as caregivers is that when children are free from worry about food, clothing or shelter, and they feel safe and loved by family and friends, then they are free to explore and learn. What a great goal!

Lynn Peterson has taught kindergarten through high school, and even some college courses thrown in for good measure. She is the author of "Scruffy", a picture book for young children who are coping with a divorce in their family, and "The Hero's Guide to Toxic Emotions" (forthcoming).